Get Outta Here
Wait, we were kidding. Adam Vinatieri signed with the Indianapolis Colts. The Colts! He might as well have joined the Taliban. Of course, just like when Johnny Damon, the long-haired, bearded one, joined the veteran Yankees team, Boston sports writers are taking the news about Adam V. in their usual calm manner...Boston also said goodbye this week to Red Sox pitcher Bronson Arroyo, who will forever be remembered with A-Rod in the famous slap play. When I first heard Arroyo was traded for Wily Mo, though, I thought the Red Sox got an old blues singer in return. Instead they got Paul Bunyan. Here's the real Paul Bunyan for comparison purposes...In other sporting news from around the world, something called the Commonwealth Games are going on and the raging debate is whether or not the Kiwis are overdoing the haka? I don't have any idea what that means, but maybe they are... Nowadays if someone set up a fallout shelter, they would stock it with the one food item capable of lasting for centuries when left in its original packaging, Hostess Twinkies. Twinkies are not only delicious, but educational and versatile....And I thought my town had issues...Forget my town or English islands, the world wants to know what the BLEEP is going on in South Park. Has Chef been replaced, had a stroke, or what? Meanwhile, it's always enjoyable making fun of Tom Cruise.